Sometime in 1955, a secretary in Richmond, Kentucky picked up an envelope, slit it open with her letter opener, and pulled out an application for admission to Eastern Kentucky University.
She passed it on to the appropriate people in the registrar's office, who read the following:
The applicant listed his date of birth as August 24, 1932, which would make him either 22 or 23, depending on when the application was received.
He was born in Baxter, Kentucky, right next to Harlan, a town built on the coal industry and famous (infamous?) for union violence. No doubt the people who read the application knew the term "Bloody Harlan".
He graduated from Rosspoint Elementary in 1947; hmm, decent grade point average, in spite of the fact that they couldn't do a full school term in the mid-1940's.
Yes, he was a high school graduate, class of 1953, Loyall High School; again, decent grade-point average.
Of particular note to the reigstrar's office was the applicant's service in the military. He was in the Army between 1953 and 1955, stationed in Pusan, Korea. He didn't fight in the Korean War, because the conflict was over by the time he got there. Although he'd been assigned to an ordnance unit, he wound up being a company clerk, an indispensable part of his military unit.
The applicant may or may not have mentioned that he was the fourth child of five, and that his mother raised their family alone after the father died in an accident.
He'd never been in trouble with the law, and he had decent character references, all of whom attested that he'd make a good addition to the student body at Eastern Kentucky.
The office stamped the application "accepted", and soon after, a secretary dropped an envelope in the mail addressed to Baxter, Kentucky, containing a letter welcoming the applicant to the graduating class of 1960.
Not only did he graduate with that class, he returned later to obtain his teaching credential, which he used in a successful teaching career.
In the above, I just dramatized/fictionalized my father's application to college.
Now, I want you to take a look at his information and ask yourself one question:
If, on the application, the race listed was "colored" instead of "white", what do you think the decision of the registrar's office would have been?
Your answer to that question may give you a good example of white privilege.
Just my .04, adjusted for inflation.
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Thursday, February 27, 2020
Tuesday, February 11, 2020
Words usually associated with the Bible Belt . . .
Right now, I'm doing a re-reading of Ray Blackston's Flabbergasted, a hilarious, wonderful Christian novel about a stockbroker who went to church to meet women and wound up meeting Jesus instead. (Read it!)
In one scene, the stockbroker is trying to calm down an angry client. The client's response is written as: "Words not usually associated with the Bible Belt rattled in my headset."
I found that a funny, appropriate way of describing the client's response without resorting to the actual words.
Yesterday, I got to use that phrase in responding to a thread containing atrocious, offensive, racist responses to someone's blog.
Bobby Valentine, a Church of Christ preacher, writes a blog about church history and his theological journey. Yesterday, he posted a link to this blog entry on a Facebook group. He wrote about why we need Black History Month. Bobby is white but has a heart and desire to learn about people of color and to understand their history and culture, as much as it's possible for a someone who's not a person of color.
He received this response: "Why do we spend an entire month celebrating the history of a group of people who make 15% of the American population, and literally contribute nothing but violence and crime, and then completely ignore the European Americans?"
That, alone, makes me want to use a long list of words "not usually associated with the Bible Belt". Does he not remember the names of Ron McNair, Oprah Winfrey, Barack and Michelle Obama, Mae Jemison, Nichelle Nichols, Stevie Wonder, and others?
And does he also not realize that "European Americans" are hardly ignored? See George Washington, our Founding Fathers, Abraham Lincoln, et. al.
I truly hope this poster was a troll, or a bot, because he went on to state: (and the following contains words that will be considered offensive, so please exercise appropriate self-care.)
"If you're white and don't understand or care why your own race, and your own people who founded this country, and created the greatest civilizations aren't celebrated, you're blind."
"I'm asking why there's no celebration, not even one day, for the achievements and influence of European people in America, who founded and created this country, and wanting that makes me a white supremacist?"
He ended with "you're just completely cucked by the (((media)))".
When someone asked what (((media))) meant, I was stunned by the answer (this Wikipedia article gives a more thorough explanation): The triple parenthesis is right-wing hate speech for "Jewish." "Cucked" is right-wing hate speech meaning "people who are fools and believe "lamestream" media. "Cucked" is short for "cuckold," a reference to a man whose wife has been unfaithful to him. The word is often used as a term of derision.
In other words, Bobby was being stupidly deceived by the Jewish-owned media.
No, those are not words usually associated with the Bible Belt, but I deliberately used them to show to show the evil that is out there and that, unfortunately, some Christians believe.
I can point to a long list of people of color, starting in my own church, who do not contribute "nothing but violence and crime". In fact, people of color have too often been the victims of that "violence and crime".
I can point to Columbus Day, Presidents' Day, and Fourth of July as days when the achievements of "European Americans" have been celebrated.
And I wonder if by "European Americans" this poster means, "White, Anglo-Saxon, and Protestant", because Italians, Irish, Slavics, and Catholics have routinely been targets of scorn and prejudice. (Look up the acronym Nina. And who remembers Polish jokes?)
Are these the words that we want to have "usually associated with the Bible Belt"? Words that denigrate people of color and people who are not Christian? Words that hate and attack?
I worry about being racist, because I'm white, and I don't understand what people of color have and do face in this country. While I can say I'm not a blatant racist (I am not a Klan member and I abhor our history of slavery and Jim Crow) I worry about being a subtle, unknowing racist.
This is not what I want associated with the Bible Belt.
But apparently, according to some, the Bible Belt stands for exactly that.
I fear for our country. I fear that the polarization has become so extreme that there is no way to bridge it.
Are these words words that we want associated with the Bible Belt?
Think about it.
Just my .04, adjusted for inflation.
In one scene, the stockbroker is trying to calm down an angry client. The client's response is written as: "Words not usually associated with the Bible Belt rattled in my headset."
I found that a funny, appropriate way of describing the client's response without resorting to the actual words.
Yesterday, I got to use that phrase in responding to a thread containing atrocious, offensive, racist responses to someone's blog.
Bobby Valentine, a Church of Christ preacher, writes a blog about church history and his theological journey. Yesterday, he posted a link to this blog entry on a Facebook group. He wrote about why we need Black History Month. Bobby is white but has a heart and desire to learn about people of color and to understand their history and culture, as much as it's possible for a someone who's not a person of color.
He received this response: "Why do we spend an entire month celebrating the history of a group of people who make 15% of the American population, and literally contribute nothing but violence and crime, and then completely ignore the European Americans?"
That, alone, makes me want to use a long list of words "not usually associated with the Bible Belt". Does he not remember the names of Ron McNair, Oprah Winfrey, Barack and Michelle Obama, Mae Jemison, Nichelle Nichols, Stevie Wonder, and others?
And does he also not realize that "European Americans" are hardly ignored? See George Washington, our Founding Fathers, Abraham Lincoln, et. al.
I truly hope this poster was a troll, or a bot, because he went on to state: (and the following contains words that will be considered offensive, so please exercise appropriate self-care.)
"If you're white and don't understand or care why your own race, and your own people who founded this country, and created the greatest civilizations aren't celebrated, you're blind."
"I'm asking why there's no celebration, not even one day, for the achievements and influence of European people in America, who founded and created this country, and wanting that makes me a white supremacist?"
He ended with "you're just completely cucked by the (((media)))".
When someone asked what (((media))) meant, I was stunned by the answer (this Wikipedia article gives a more thorough explanation): The triple parenthesis is right-wing hate speech for "Jewish." "Cucked" is right-wing hate speech meaning "people who are fools and believe "lamestream" media. "Cucked" is short for "cuckold," a reference to a man whose wife has been unfaithful to him. The word is often used as a term of derision.
In other words, Bobby was being stupidly deceived by the Jewish-owned media.
No, those are not words usually associated with the Bible Belt, but I deliberately used them to show to show the evil that is out there and that, unfortunately, some Christians believe.
I can point to a long list of people of color, starting in my own church, who do not contribute "nothing but violence and crime". In fact, people of color have too often been the victims of that "violence and crime".
I can point to Columbus Day, Presidents' Day, and Fourth of July as days when the achievements of "European Americans" have been celebrated.
And I wonder if by "European Americans" this poster means, "White, Anglo-Saxon, and Protestant", because Italians, Irish, Slavics, and Catholics have routinely been targets of scorn and prejudice. (Look up the acronym Nina. And who remembers Polish jokes?)
Are these the words that we want to have "usually associated with the Bible Belt"? Words that denigrate people of color and people who are not Christian? Words that hate and attack?
I worry about being racist, because I'm white, and I don't understand what people of color have and do face in this country. While I can say I'm not a blatant racist (I am not a Klan member and I abhor our history of slavery and Jim Crow) I worry about being a subtle, unknowing racist.
This is not what I want associated with the Bible Belt.
But apparently, according to some, the Bible Belt stands for exactly that.
I fear for our country. I fear that the polarization has become so extreme that there is no way to bridge it.
Are these words words that we want associated with the Bible Belt?
Think about it.
Just my .04, adjusted for inflation.
Monday, February 10, 2020
Expectations
Last year, a page I follow posted a link to this article about chronic illnesses, commenting: "the expectations of modern society are so extreme, no wonder so many people have chronic illnesses."
I follow that particular page because I have interstitial cystitis (just think, chronic bladder pain), along with possible adrenal fatigue, back pain, and sleep apnea; not to mention depression and OCD.
Can I be honest here?
I feel the extreme expectations as a woman from both sides of the aisle, from secular and Christian sides.
On the secular side:
"Gotta have that career. It's all about the career. You can't depend on a man, nor should you. So you gotta have that degree, gotta have that career. But that career can only be a STEM (science, technology, engineering, mathematics) profession, or a glass-ceiling shattering executive or politician. After all, your foremothers sacrificed everything for the rights and opportunities you now take for granted. So how dare you be a traitor to the sisterhood by taking a traditionally feminized job such as teacher, librarian, court reporter, secretary, office assistant, or nurse! And forget about being a waitress or in similar "pink-collar" jobs. It's a slap in the face to the sisterhood who fought so hard for your rights and your opportunities.
"Okay, if you feel like you have to have a man, we'll cut you some slack. But only a little bit. Because you know, it's all about that career and being independent and taking care of yourself. After all, that man might leave you someday. So you have to show that you can stand on your own two feet! In fact, if you absolutely feel like you have to have someone, go find another woman. They'll treat you better than men will!
"You want children? You want to have your own children? Okay, again, maybe we'll cut you some slack there. But remember, it's all about that career! You don't want to be on the 'mommy track', do you? So if you absolutely have to have those kids, all right, have them . . . but remember, it's all about the career. So take your six weeks maternity leave and then get back in the office. Put the kids in day care. Or hire a nanny. Even better, make him stay home with the baby!
"Or, even better, if you absolutely have to have kids, go adopt. There's so many kids who need loving homes.
"While you're working on that career, you gotta stay healthy. Gotta join that gym, take that spin class, do Zumba. Gotta eat healthy. Fresh, whole, unprocessed food -- but make sure it's organic, locally sourced, non-GMO, antibiotic-free, hormone-free, grass-fed, free-range, and fair trade. How dare you contribute to the exploitation of workers all over the world!
"And above all, women must.be.STRONG. Because hey, strength is the new beauty, you know? If you go through a trauma in your life and don't come out STRONG on the other end, something is wrong with you."
Then, on the Christian side:
"Gotta have that family. It's all about the family. Okay, we'll accept that you may have to work when you're single, because you do have to earn a living. But once you get married, it's all about the husband. You know, that wonderful man you should have been praying for since you were a child? The one that God has hand-picked for you?
"Your job is to be a submissive wife and serve him. Okay, maybe in this day and age both of you have to work, but it's really better that you don't, that you devote your time to the care of the home and to your husband.
"And kids? Of course, you're going to have kids. Birth control? Nope, no pill because the pill prevents implantation of a fertilized egg, and that's the same thing as having an abortion. The only acceptable method of contraception is the rhythm method. Your womb is God's, give it to Him. If you're capable of having children and you choose not to, you are flat out selfish and you are denying a potential child the opportunity for salvation. Where are the next generation of Christians going to come from if the Christians do not reproduce?
"Once you have those kids, stop working. You can't successfully juggle a job and kids too. Because remember, it's all about the family. You need to stay home and take care of those kids. What, you say you feel unfulfilled by cooking and changing diapers and wiping noses all day? How selfish! Because remember, it's all about the family. And mothers are on the hook for the first few years of a child's life. Yeah, dads are important, but it's the moms who are on the hook. You have to breast-feed and make your baby food from scratch and use cloth diapers.
"Hope you're planning to homeschool all those kids. Because the public -- excuse me, 'government' -- school system is godless and pushes an agenda. Besides, parents are supposed to be their children's primary teachers. It's their responsibility to train their children in the 'nurture and admonition of the Lord'. So how dare you palm that off of anyone else!
"Okay, if you absolutely have to send your kids to school, it better be Christian or private. But under no circumstances do you send your kids to a godless public school where you can't pray and where God isn't allowed. Can't afford it? God will provide! You just need to make the sacrifices!
"But your number one priority, after God, should be your family. You need to be the first one up in the mornings, and the very first thing you need to do is to have your 'quiet time', and it had better be a good one. It needs to teach you more about God or convict you of your sin. When you say your prayers, it better not be about you and your needs because that's selfish. You need to be saying those prayers for other people because they need it!
"By the time the family comes down for breakfast, it needs to be on the table. Then you need to kiss your husband goodbye and get ready for the day. The house must be kept clean and tidy, and the children must be well-behaved and obedient. If they're not? Discipline them, which means 'spank them'.
"You must keep yourself attractive for your husband. No frumpiness, and no gaining weight. Make sure you have dinner ready when husband comes home. Put on makeup and a nice dress. Greet him with a smile and let him complain because he's had a hard day, harder than yours. He's the king of the castle, and when he comes home, you need to remember that the king is home!
"When he wants sex, you'd better drop everything and do it. 'No' is not an option. Because if you don't give him what he needs, he's going to find someone else who will. You don't want that, do you? Bascially, if you don't keep yourself attractive and give him sex whenever he wants, he'll leave you for another woman.
"And above all, women must.be. quiet, gentle, and submissive, not just to their husbands, but to all men. Because hey, women were created as the 'helpmeet' for men. They are the support people. They stay in the background and make sure men can do what God created them to do!"
Just writing this has made me exhausted. I feel as if I can't be a "real woman" without meeting the expectations I wrote about secular women; but I also feel that I can't be a "real Christian woman" without meeting the expectations I wrote about them.
Is there anyone else who feels the way I do?
Just my .04, adjusted for inflation.
I follow that particular page because I have interstitial cystitis (just think, chronic bladder pain), along with possible adrenal fatigue, back pain, and sleep apnea; not to mention depression and OCD.
Can I be honest here?
I feel the extreme expectations as a woman from both sides of the aisle, from secular and Christian sides.
On the secular side:
"Gotta have that career. It's all about the career. You can't depend on a man, nor should you. So you gotta have that degree, gotta have that career. But that career can only be a STEM (science, technology, engineering, mathematics) profession, or a glass-ceiling shattering executive or politician. After all, your foremothers sacrificed everything for the rights and opportunities you now take for granted. So how dare you be a traitor to the sisterhood by taking a traditionally feminized job such as teacher, librarian, court reporter, secretary, office assistant, or nurse! And forget about being a waitress or in similar "pink-collar" jobs. It's a slap in the face to the sisterhood who fought so hard for your rights and your opportunities.
"Okay, if you feel like you have to have a man, we'll cut you some slack. But only a little bit. Because you know, it's all about that career and being independent and taking care of yourself. After all, that man might leave you someday. So you have to show that you can stand on your own two feet! In fact, if you absolutely feel like you have to have someone, go find another woman. They'll treat you better than men will!
"You want children? You want to have your own children? Okay, again, maybe we'll cut you some slack there. But remember, it's all about that career! You don't want to be on the 'mommy track', do you? So if you absolutely have to have those kids, all right, have them . . . but remember, it's all about the career. So take your six weeks maternity leave and then get back in the office. Put the kids in day care. Or hire a nanny. Even better, make him stay home with the baby!
"Or, even better, if you absolutely have to have kids, go adopt. There's so many kids who need loving homes.
"While you're working on that career, you gotta stay healthy. Gotta join that gym, take that spin class, do Zumba. Gotta eat healthy. Fresh, whole, unprocessed food -- but make sure it's organic, locally sourced, non-GMO, antibiotic-free, hormone-free, grass-fed, free-range, and fair trade. How dare you contribute to the exploitation of workers all over the world!
"And above all, women must.be.STRONG. Because hey, strength is the new beauty, you know? If you go through a trauma in your life and don't come out STRONG on the other end, something is wrong with you."
Then, on the Christian side:
"Gotta have that family. It's all about the family. Okay, we'll accept that you may have to work when you're single, because you do have to earn a living. But once you get married, it's all about the husband. You know, that wonderful man you should have been praying for since you were a child? The one that God has hand-picked for you?
"Your job is to be a submissive wife and serve him. Okay, maybe in this day and age both of you have to work, but it's really better that you don't, that you devote your time to the care of the home and to your husband.
"And kids? Of course, you're going to have kids. Birth control? Nope, no pill because the pill prevents implantation of a fertilized egg, and that's the same thing as having an abortion. The only acceptable method of contraception is the rhythm method. Your womb is God's, give it to Him. If you're capable of having children and you choose not to, you are flat out selfish and you are denying a potential child the opportunity for salvation. Where are the next generation of Christians going to come from if the Christians do not reproduce?
"Once you have those kids, stop working. You can't successfully juggle a job and kids too. Because remember, it's all about the family. You need to stay home and take care of those kids. What, you say you feel unfulfilled by cooking and changing diapers and wiping noses all day? How selfish! Because remember, it's all about the family. And mothers are on the hook for the first few years of a child's life. Yeah, dads are important, but it's the moms who are on the hook. You have to breast-feed and make your baby food from scratch and use cloth diapers.
"Hope you're planning to homeschool all those kids. Because the public -- excuse me, 'government' -- school system is godless and pushes an agenda. Besides, parents are supposed to be their children's primary teachers. It's their responsibility to train their children in the 'nurture and admonition of the Lord'. So how dare you palm that off of anyone else!
"Okay, if you absolutely have to send your kids to school, it better be Christian or private. But under no circumstances do you send your kids to a godless public school where you can't pray and where God isn't allowed. Can't afford it? God will provide! You just need to make the sacrifices!
"But your number one priority, after God, should be your family. You need to be the first one up in the mornings, and the very first thing you need to do is to have your 'quiet time', and it had better be a good one. It needs to teach you more about God or convict you of your sin. When you say your prayers, it better not be about you and your needs because that's selfish. You need to be saying those prayers for other people because they need it!
"By the time the family comes down for breakfast, it needs to be on the table. Then you need to kiss your husband goodbye and get ready for the day. The house must be kept clean and tidy, and the children must be well-behaved and obedient. If they're not? Discipline them, which means 'spank them'.
"You must keep yourself attractive for your husband. No frumpiness, and no gaining weight. Make sure you have dinner ready when husband comes home. Put on makeup and a nice dress. Greet him with a smile and let him complain because he's had a hard day, harder than yours. He's the king of the castle, and when he comes home, you need to remember that the king is home!
"When he wants sex, you'd better drop everything and do it. 'No' is not an option. Because if you don't give him what he needs, he's going to find someone else who will. You don't want that, do you? Bascially, if you don't keep yourself attractive and give him sex whenever he wants, he'll leave you for another woman.
"And above all, women must.be. quiet, gentle, and submissive, not just to their husbands, but to all men. Because hey, women were created as the 'helpmeet' for men. They are the support people. They stay in the background and make sure men can do what God created them to do!"
Just writing this has made me exhausted. I feel as if I can't be a "real woman" without meeting the expectations I wrote about secular women; but I also feel that I can't be a "real Christian woman" without meeting the expectations I wrote about them.
Is there anyone else who feels the way I do?
Just my .04, adjusted for inflation.
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