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Saturday, October 22, 2016

I heard it through the CPAP . . .

(This is probably THE most bizarre blog entry I have ever written.  Maybe it will serve as a distraction in these days leading up to the election.)

I just turned 53.  Those of you that are of my generation probably remember the Partridge Family, a series about the comedic adventures of a singing family.  In one episode, Laurie, the second-oldest child and oldest daughter, gets braces . . . and during rehearsals, the metal in her mouth starts picking up signals from her boyfriend's transistor radio.

I'm having the same experience with my CPAP.

I have sleep apnea, and for the past several years, I've been sleeping with a CPAP mask.  In fact, I'm so used to it that when I recently tried to sleep without it for a night, I couldn't do it.

But also, for the past several years, I've been hearing noises through my CPAP that I'm convinced are from a radio station.  I just can't figure out which one.

It started when I was hearing, "It's the radio show / WAYB / WAYB / it's the radio show," sung to the tune of the song, "Turn the Radio On".  It sounded like a jingle for a broadcast segment.

Before you ask, yes, I have searched on the Internet, and yes, I did find a WAYB, 95.7 FM, in Graysville, TN.  I live in Atlanta, about 150 miles away.  It's possible that my CPAP could be picking up the signals from this station.  However, this WAYB doesn't broadcast on the Internet, so I can't compare what I'm hearing on my CPAP with the radio station.

But more recently, I haven't been hearing the jingle.  Instead, I've been hearing letters and odd sentences coming through my CPAP.

I hear someone saying the letters, "W-A-Y-A, W-A-Y-C, W-A-Y-D, W-A-Y-E . . ." and on. Sometimes they start at the end of the alphabet, "W-A-Y-Z, W-A-Y-Y, W-A-Y-X, W-A-Y-V . . ." and so on.

Within the last couple of weeks, I've started to hear, "W-A-Y-B, W-C-K-G." Or, possibly, W-Z-K-G, or W-C-K-Z, or something similar sounding . . .  and then, W-O-I-See, W-O-I-Hear, W-O-I-Smell, W-O-I-Taste.

I don't know what I am hearing.  I don't know if it's a station identification, or someone just playing games, or what.

So tell me, am I legitimately hearing something through my CPAP?

Or am I, like Marvin Gaye sang in the song, just about to lose my mind, honey, honey?

Just my .04, adjusted for inflation.

1 comment:

  1. In many sufferers of obstructive sleep apnea, the use of a full-face CPAP mask is highly recommended because of its health benefits. With the CPAP machine, mild air pressure is feed into the person's airways, thus, keeping it open while you sleep cpap aspiration risk.

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